The Knight in Shining Armor

Storm Watch, my draft horse partner

Like it or not, our pets are going to assume a role in our life. If we’re not intentional about it, then things can go a bit haywire. That feels as bad to our pet as it does to us!

This was the case with my horse, Storm. If you’re not familiar with him yet, he’s a big gray draft-cross, and I have struggled with fear issues with him for most of our relationship. He has a way of triggering the points in someone just by his sheer presence and size (he does weigh over 2000 pounds, and his head is the height of my torso alone).
One day I was exasperated that I was yet again feeling anxious about working with him, and he was (again) nervous an antsy as a result. We were trapped in a cycle that had no end. Unless I could do something different.

I was frustrated that he wasn’t living up to the ‘cool and relaxed’ persona that everyone assumes a draft horse is supposed to have. No where in the descriptions that I had stumbled across did it say “flighty, nervous, and prone to bolting” in association with draft horses. Somewhere along the way we had stumbled very far off the track I was wishing we were on.

It dawned on me that Storm is half Percheron (the other side is Thoroughbred/Shire cross). Percherons come from the former Perche Province of France (currently the Huisne River Valley) and were bred to carry the knights into battle. In order to do that job, they had to be smart, able to think in tricky situations, and support and cooperate with their rider (who was in heavy armor and might not be able to see very clearly). They worked as a team together to achieve the Knight’s goal.

Here we are, and none of that was working out to be true. But could it? At that point I made the decision that I needed a Knight to help support me. I spent some time connecting with Storm while he grazed and talked from my heart about what I needed from him, and why I was struggling so much (his fear was triggering my fear, which was making him more afraid. Lather, rinse, repeat). That did not feel good to me, and I’m sure it didn’t feel good to him.

I explained to him where his history came from, and that he was very capable of being a Knight horse, but it would require both of us working together. I needed a Knight, and in return I would work to be his fair lady. I promised to communicate, and be clear, and to own up to when I wasn’t doing a very good job managing my own energy. I would make sure I let him know if I wasn’t doing very well and needed more help from him, and agreed that if he needed more help from me I would do my best to support him.

From that day forward our relationship shifted. He was much steadier with me, and I was able to be a lot more honest, both with myself, and to him, about where I was and what I could and couldn’t do on any given day to support him and me. That shift changed our relationship for the better, and we both feel so much better now that we each know what our job is.