Stressed
Walking practice with B from the right side
Life is stressful, right? There's not much to be done to avoid things that are stressful. Job stress, relationship challenges, financial issues, life provides plenty of opportunities that stress us out.
As humans, we have the ability to find ways to manage our stress, for better or worse.
Our pets are no different. Living in a human world as a pet is stressful. They have to conform to our routines, space, and lives, whether they like it or not.
I see so many pets displaying unhealthy levels of stress that the owners have just deemed "normal." I'm afraid that stress in our lives has become such a normal thing that we are almost incapable of seeing the stress in our pet's lives.
The challenge is that sometimes our pet's stress signals can be subtle.
Beauty, affectionately known as "B" for short, has now been with me for 2 months. It's normal for horses to be wary and cautious in the beginning when they arrive in a new place, I don't blame them.
But what's not normal is the level of tension in her body when interacting with me. Or her absolute requirement that I not be allowed on her right side.
The part that makes me sad is that these are behaviors that I am sure she has displayed in the past, but were written off as "normal," particularly because she isn't fighting, she appears calm. She may be "calm" but she's not relaxed.
What bothers me the most about this is the fact that no one has stopped and worked to help build her confidence so that she isn't stressed out by basic handling situations. No doubt there is trauma in her past of some kind, but once she was out of that situation she was not encouraged to change her behavior because she wasn't a danger to herself or others. So the stress stayed.
I wish I could say her example is unusual, but it's not. I've seen it with dogs and with cats. All displaying stress and anxiety, but yet the humans in their lives are tolerating the behavior, and it's "just how they are."
The good news is there are so many resources available to work on these issues with our pets. There's lots of free information out there if you're willing to spend time digging (falling into the rabbit hole...) and a willingness to explore. You'll get there faster if you hire a reputable trainer that recognizes those subtle behaviors that the rest of the world has termed 'normal' and wants to improve the lives of the animals.
It breaks my heart to know that my dogs lived with a lot of these behaviors, because I didn't know any better when I had them so many years ago. I'm grateful that now I have the information, and the resources to be able to do different the next time, and that's my hope for anyone reading this. When you know better, you can do better.
Stress is stress, and by bringing animals into my life, I am subjecting them to the stress of a human world. There's no excuse for me not being willing to learn how to give them the tools to be as resilient and at ease in my world as possible. That’s my wish for all pets, no matter their situation.
